Charlotte Rose: 7 months

I think I've started every one of Charlotte update posts exactly the same way...where the hell have the last 7 months gone?!  I seriously feel like I blinked and my baby is graduating from college haha!  Okay, maybe not that dramatic, but still.

But I don't yearn for the newborn days.  Being a therapist that worked with children, all I wanted to see was growth, milestones met, goals achieved.  I look forward to her crawling and walking, swimming, jumping, talking, saying mama, much more then I like looking back.  I actually had another mom explain the first few months of her daughters life to me, and a light switch went off...."YES, me too!"

What did she say?  She said she felt like she missed out on the first few months of her daughters life because of postpartum depression.

First though, we'll talk about the good (because tears in the first 5 minutes of writing are never a good way to start).

Charlotte was one of the first names I mentioned to Jeremy that I liked.  I wanted to nickname her Charlie...so cute, right?!  When our sweet babe entered the world and we brought her home, Jeremy started calling her Lottie.  I was not so sure about this new nickname, but I didn't feel like Charlie fit her either, she's too girly for it I think.  But the more he used Lottie, the more it grew on me.

So what's our Lottie up to these days?

• She's 15.5 pounds, 25.25 inches long
• Rolling
• Sitting independently
• Army crawling
• Standing with one hand support
• "Dances" when her music toys play
• Trying to walk along the couch
• Starting to sign milk and wave
• Going underwater at swim class (holding her breath and closing her eyes)
• LOVES splashing in the pool and bath water
• Eating mashed: bananas, carrots, avocado, and pears - and a mixture of them as well
• Almost sleeping through the night
• 2+ naps/day

She is such an observer, and is always looking around to see what's going on.  She only sleeps in the car or in her crib/playpen because if we're anywhere else she needs to be a nosy nelly and be all up in everyone's business.  She loves her play dates with her friends Sage, Ryah, and Tatum; and likes going on walks with baby Leo and baby Sarah.  She loves visiting her great grandma every week after swim practice and blowing her raspberries.

Well...after all that good stuff, I don't want to relive the bad.  So for today, I think I'll end it with some adorable 7 month pictures of beautiful babe.

Week 10: Surgery...tomorrow???

Well, the recovery road continues...

I knew that this day was a possibility as I went into my doctor's appointment Tuesday June 24 knowing deep down that this new cream hadn't worked, that my body hadn't somehow changed it's mind and started to heal itself like it should have long ago.

I guess I should back up a little, as some don't know the full history of my recovery issues.  From about 10 days postpartum I have been in and out of doctor's offices on a weekly if not daily basis.  Whether that be my OBGYN, the lactation consultant, pediatric appointments for Charlotte, or tongue tie procedures; we have been on the go from early on.

My OB noticed from around week 4 that my tear was not healing as it should and started interventions at that point.  I had also done some things on my own, including sitz baths, using essential oils, resting as much as possible.  But even with medical interventions, my tear was not healing.  They would have me try something new for a couple of weeks and then come in for a follow up appointment, where minimal, if any, progress had been made.

At week 9 my OB thought that we should go ahead and schedule surgery to assist in repairing the tissue.  She had an additional doctor come in for a second opinion and he suggested estrogen cream for one more week, and if no improvement at that point, surgical repair would be the final step.  So, I went in for my follow up on Tuesday and she said, "How's tomorrow work for you?"

It's been three days since my surgery and it somehow still feels like a dream, that this isn't really happening to me, and I'm ready to wake up from this nightmare and be back to normal.

I've never had surgery before, never had to be put under anesthesia for anything, so I was nervous to say the least.  My biggest concern was nursing Charlotte, and keeping my supply up if I had to take a break from feeding due to medications.  My doctor reassured me that I would be able to feed her once before going into surgery, and that I may have to pump and dump once, but then could go back to our normal feeding schedule.

With only 24 hours notice, I started pumping every session I was nursing Charlotte on the opposite side (BIG thanks to Elisa for sharing this advice with me!!).  I wold be gone for about 6 hours and wanted to prevent giving her formula as much as possible.  I know giving her formula isn't that big of a deal to most people out there, but it does in fact give her a bit of digestive issues, and I just feel better feeding her my milk.  So, somehow, I managed to pump nearly 10 ounces by the time I left for the hospital.

My mom, without hesitation, immediately came up to help us out.  She stayed home with Charlotte while Jeremy and I made the all too familiar trek to the hospital.  We had to check in at 1:00 pm on Wednesday and the surgery was scheduled for 3:00 pm.  I brought my pump to the hospital and was able to pump just before they wheeled me back.

My doctor came in first, after the pre-op nurse took my vitals, put in my IV and prepped me for surgery.  She reassured me again that I would be able to nurse Charlotte after pumping and dumping once and I felt relieved. She answered all of my questions honestly and matter of factually.  The anesthesiologist came in next with the nurse who would be with me during surgery.  I do feel it's important to note that he was male (and has no idea what breastfeeding and formula mean to an exclusively breastfeeding mama).  I asked him when I would be able to feed Charlotte next and he told me 24 hours after surgery.  I immediately started crying.  He explained why, and the nurses asked why I was so upset.  Other then the fact that I wouldn't be able to feed my daughter, I was scared.  I didn't know what any of this would be like, how would recovery be this time around, would this surgery actually work?  So, she offered to give me something to calm me down.  I kissed Jeremy goodbye, and they wheeled me back to surgery.

I don't remember much about the operating room.  I recall them saying they would put an oxygen mask over my nose and mouth and it would smell like a beach ball, but don't remember that actually happening.  The next thing I remember, I was was waking up in the recovery room crying.  The nurse asked what was wrong, and I said I just wanted to be able to nurse Charlotte.  She was...a witch to put it nicely.  She said something along the lines of, "why do you want to give your baby all those drungs?!"  Thanks for the empathy lady, I appreciate it!  I asked over and over for Jeremy and she said it would be an hour before I would be able to see him.

Thankfully another nurse came on shift and was so much more pleasant and helpful; amazing actually.  She immediately put me at ease and assisted Jeremy with getting me ready to go back home.  Jeremy said my doctor came out and talked to him, explaining everything had gone well.  That they didn't have to take out as much tissue as she though she was originally going to have to, and said she would call me later on that evening to check up on me.

On our way home she did in fact call.  She immediately apologized for the poor bedside manner of the anesthesiologist.  She explained that she called the anesthesiologist that she normally works with in OB surgeries (who by the way is a woman, and was out of town on vacation) and explained to her what medications I received and at what dosage.  This anesthesiologist said what my doctor had originally told me.  Pump and dump once and get back to nursing my daughter.  I have never felt more taken care of by a person in the medical field as I did at that point.

So where do we go from here?  My doctor explained to me that she believes I will heal in about two weeks.  So, I made my follow up appointment and we'll just have to wait and see.  I know that this is a very minor set back.  I didn't have any problems conceiving, my pregnancy was pretty uneventful, and although I had a long labor, I came home with a beautiful baby girl.  I'm otherwise in great health, but I can't help but feel as though my body has betrayed me.

Tuesday night, the night before my surgery, I laid in bed nursing my daughter and crying to my husband.  Not understanding why this is happening to me.  What lesson am I supposed to be learning from all of this?  Patience? Understanding that everything isn't in my control?  It just doesn't seem fair.  I'm not holding my breath this is going to be a fix all, it hasn't been that way up until this point.  My glass is half empty.  I don't want to get my hopes up and go back in two weeks just to hear it hasn't gone as well as I hoped it would.

Good vibes my way would be much appreciated!

Charlotte Rose: Week 7

 We are quickly approaching the 8 week mark...2 months already?!  How is this possible?  The time has flown by and I can't believe how much I have learned in the past couple of weeks.  I'm definitely hoping to blog more frequently then once a month, but not pressuring myself into that.  I would love to record every little detail of our babe, but I'm also realistic on the expectations of my own time.

Something I wanted to discuss this post was the topic of attachment parenting.  Surprisingly, when I was pregnant, I did not go into information overload.  I am definitely a Type-A personality and have bought books upon books, as well as researched many of topics that have come up throughout my adult life.  But while pregnant, that was the last thing I wanted to do.  I wanted to experience things on my own without others opinions or unneeded information clouding my own judgement.  Of course when things popped up, like my Group B Strep test results, I researched enough to fulfill my own needs, but again tried not to overload on the information. (my husband might have a different opinion on that last statement)

This was also true with how we were going to parent our new baby.  I knew I wanted to breastfeed, and we had registered for a bassinet so the baby could sleep next to us the first few months.  But other then that, I guess we wanted to see how things went before committing to anything.

I had heard of co-sleeping, and always thought to myself, "aren't the afraid of rolling over onto their baby, or SIDS, ...and what about how it effect the relationship with their significant other???"  I had also heard of baby wearing, and had registered for the baby k'tan as I had heard good reviews.  We had friends who raved about wearing their babies throughout the day, how much easier it made their lives, and despite other's opinions of their children becoming "clingy" it was actually quite the opposite.

Once Charlotte got here and we attempted breastfeeding, I was quick to learn it was just easier to keep her in bed with us as we were feeding on demand rather then trying to set some sort of schedule.  She always seemed to wake up when I tried to put her back into the bassinet after nursing; and when she woke up and wanted to nurse, I could more quickly attend to her needs if she was already in the bed with us.  Less crying = happier baby and mama (and daddy).

I haven't been the best at wearing Charlotte.  Her favorite position is over the shoulder, and the only position I had learned to put her in the sling was the "Newborn Kangaroo" position.  She didn't really like this as her favorite position is being high up over the shoulder to explore.  As she's gotten older we have been able to adapt to new positions that I think will work better for us, and she actually ends up falling asleep while I do dishes or laundry, which is great!

Keeping Charlotte so close all the time has helped nurture our bond. I feel like I am more able to efficiently meet her needs as it has made me more attentive and I've learned to interpret her nonverbal cues.  For example, I know when she whines and doesn't really cry or get red in the face she usually needs a diaper change.  If she's smacking her lips or eating her hands she's hungry.  If I don't catch those cues fast enough and she starts to cry and get red in the face I know she's hungry.  So I would say we naturally fell into attachment parenting.

The thing I didn't expect was thinking I'd be judged on these techniques.  I'm always hesitant to tell people we're co-sleeping, and I think that's because I was quick to judge others prior to having my own child.  I've learned throughout this process to be willing to be flexible.  This works for us now, but it may not in a few months.  We'll just have to wait and see.

In other news, mom and baby are doing well.  I'm still not fully healed but I have been cleared to do some light exercise.  I am so ecstatic about this, and know it will also help me mentally.  We are currently breastfeeding with shields.  Our lactation consultant would like me to gradually stop using them and attempt nursing without, but I'm addicted.  It's just so easy to put them on and she latches right away.  Without is...well, it's work.  I feel like they're my crutch and I just need to put them away for a few hours and really try.  Maybe that'll be my goal for the rest of the week.

Charlotte is amazing!  She is so much more alert, I can tell her vision is improving as she will track things that are further away from her.  She is doing really well during tummy time and is keeping her head up off the play mat a couple of inches for a minute or so at a time.  She is starting to coo and her voice is getting louder.  She does this little yelp as a warning cry before she gets really mad, which I think is so cute.  She smiles so much more during the mornings, especially when I'm changing her diaper.  We got my mom an iPad for Mother's Day and have been face-timing a couple of times a week.

I'll add some pictures soon of our many adventures...

Charlotte Rose: 1 Month!

I can't believe my baby is one month old today!  This past weekend was full of fun and celebration as we spent time with our family and friends for my first Mother's Day and my birthday was the next day.

Charlotte and Jeremy had a beautiful ring made for me by our family friend Harry down in Sierra Vista.  They used some stones from a ring my parents had given me and designed a new setting.  The emerald stone is my birth stone and the diamonds on the sides are April's birthstone for Charlotte.  I think it turned out perfectly, I absolutely love it.

Beautiful birthday and Mother's Day gifts

I was also spoiled by my family and friends as we celebrated Saturday at one of our favorite restaurants Liberty Market.  Everyone who hadn't yet met Charlotte was able to hold her and she did VERY well!  She slept nearly the entire time and was so good.  We call her our little people pleaser as she is so good when we have visitors or are visiting others, but when it's just Jeremy and I at home, boy does she exercise those lungs!

Elise with baby Charlotte

Update on Charlotte:  We have had two doctor's appointments this week.  We visited the lactation consultant on Monday and she thinks her tongue-tie is healing very well with improved range of motion in her tongue and jaw.  She also thinks that even though we're using a shield during feedings, her lip tie is improving and she's not curling her lip under nearly as much as she was.  I'm keeping my fingers crossed that she doesn't have to have her upper lip tie done as well, but we'll find that out on Friday at our follow up appointment.

We also went to see our favorite doctor: Dr. Ross at We Care Family Wellness Center.  He is an osteopath and is working on Charlotte to improve her neck and jaw range of motion.

We are also working on tummy time and improving her neck strength.  She is awake for longer periods of time and much more alert when she is awake.  She loves looking around and exploring.  She is on the verge of smiling/laughing, it's going to be any day now I can feel it! 

Although this is Charlotte's play gym where she practices tummy time, the cats seem to love it more then she does!

We are going on our first roadtrip tomorrow.  (This is Jeremy's idea by the way)  We will be driving down to Sierra Vista to visit my parents as it's my mom's birthday. 

mini photo shoot on her one month birthday

Uncle Travis made a visit and spent some time with baby Charlie

We got to view some of Charlotte's newborn pictures, this is one of my favorites

Charlotte Rose Week 2-3: Reality Check

It has definitely been a trying couple of weeks for us. Like everything else, I though we'd get the hang of breastfeeding fairly easily, but we have been proven wrong. I never knew how much went into feeding your infant; the mechanics of not just her, but you as well.  And how much anatomy plays a huge role in it. 

We started having issues about 10 days in. I was so uncomfortable sitting and nursing, due to the recovery from delivery, that I was attempting to nurse Charlotte in a variety of positions. Soon after I started to feel pain when breastfeeding on my right side. In fact, I had encountered some tissue damage leaving me to pump on my right side. So we were exclusively breastfeeding only on the left. Within days, my left side started to suffer from tissue damage as well and Charlotte was having difficulty staying latched on and had started to click when nursing. 

Things progressed very rapidly and I was in excruciating pain, dreading our next feeding session. With multiple calls to various lactation consultants, we were finally seen Tues April 29 at the ArizonaBreastfeeding  Center.  I immediately fell in love with our consultant Jennie. The atmosphere of the treatment rooms were very nice with many different options of comfy seating. Thankfully my mom was with me for this appointment and was able to help out with Charlotte while I spoke with the lactation consultant. 

Her diagnosis was that I did not have thrush, which I was thankful for. This meant Charlotte didn't have it either and hopefully recovery would be more simple. We did discover however that I have a bacterial infection in both breasts and was on the verge of mastitis. The consultant recommended I rent a hospital grade breast pump for the next couple of weeks to help with the healing process and make pumping easier as I was unable to breastfeeding at all. In addition, I was prescribed a topical ointment that has nearly resolved all of my pain thus far. 

When it came to Charlotte's turn, things weren't so simple. The consultant suggested we get an evaluation for tongue-tie as soon as possible, as well as upper lip tie. If she in fact had them severely enough, it was possible for her to have a procedure by the end of the week to improve her latch. In addition, her jaw and neck were very tight, limiting her ability to open her mouth for a correct latch.   This was Tuesday, by Wednesday we had her tongue-tie evaluation, Thursday an appointment with her pediatrician for a second opinion as well as to work on her neck and jaw since he is also an Osteopath, and by Friday we were taking her in to get her tongue-tie corrected.

It was a whirlwind of a week but I'm so thankful we got this taken care of when we did.  She was fussy for a few days, and infant Tylenol definitely helped with that.  We are being very diligent with her mouth and tongue exercises to improve her range of motion with her tongue as well as improve her sucking ability and jaw range of motion.

And although all of Charlotte's issues have been addressed it has been emotionally taxing for me.  Pumping is no fun at all!  If I'm lucky enough to get 3 hours between feedings, half of that is taken up with pumping, taking care of myself, and then changing and feeding Charlotte.  We had to start implementing paced feedings, which means that when we feed her a bottle of breastmilk we can only have her take a few sucks of it, then do mouth exercises with her in between, stretching the feeding out to 20-25 minute sessions or else she guzzles the bottle within 5 minutes and wants more even though she is full to the brim.  And with Jeremy going back to work, my mom home for a few days, there were definitely some "Baby Blue" days in the mix.  Having to pump when Charlotte wouldn't stop crying definitely sent me into a sob session of my own.  

I have to say that I am so glad we are over that hump now and things are starting to get easier.  Here are a few pictures of our week:

Charlotte in the MommaRoo

Our first family walk around the neighborhood

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 Nap time with the peanut

Tiniest little finger nails

Cheeks for days!

Becoming more awake and alert

Charlotte Rose: A Birth Story

I feel as though I've waited my whole life to tell this story.  So, on this day, her one week birthday, here is the story of how our Charlotte Rose entered our life.

Sunday April 13 started out like any other day.  We had a doctor's appointment Friday April 18 where we were 2 cm dilated, 0 station, and 90% thinned out.  Contractions were here and there, but still only Braxton Hick's, not uncomfortable at all.  I had been attempting to walk every day to help the process move along a little more swiftly, bouncing on a workout ball, dancing, eating dates, considering spicy foods.  But, all of these seemed unsuccessful.  So, Jeremy and I decided to take things into our own hands to try and induce labor.

So, after cleaning out the laundry room, top to bottom, changing the litter box, stocking up on essentials at Costco, we made a date for some bedroom time.  One hour later, labor had started and I was feeling menstrual like cramping, nothing like I had felt at any other point during my pregnancy.  We tried to go to bed, attempting to get as much sleep as possible, and around 1-1:30 I was having contractions every 15 minutes.

At this point they were uncomfortable, but not unbearable.  We started really timing things, and by 3:00 my contractions had grown closer together, nearly every 8 minutes apart.  Contemplating when to call my parents, we decided to hold out until they were every 6 minutes apart; when they got to every 5 minutes apart my OB advised us to head down to the hospital.

I'm not exactly sure at what point Jeremy called my parents, around 3:30 or 4:00 Monday morning (our due date), but by 4:30, we were making our 35 minute journey to the hospital.  I was thankful we left when we did as we avoided rush hour traffic, making the trek a little less stressful.

I was practicing my hypnobirthing, but it felt as though I couldn't concentrate enough during my contractions to relax and settle into that deep relaxation state.  Between contractions it was working like a dream, and I was able to rest well before the next one came along.

We arrived at the hospital, checked in, and Jeremy wheeled me back to triage.  The nurse hooked me up to the fetal monitor, the contraction monitor, checked my oxygen levels, as well as the blood pressure cuff.  She proceeded to ask me a million questions, which we knew were coming.  Explaining most of that was in our birth preferences, she said she still had to verbally ask us everything.  Finally she checked me, and to my surprise, I was still only 2 cm dilated, and was not contracting consistently enough to be admitted.

So, they sent us home.  When we asked, "How do we know when to come back?" the nurse replied, "Trust me, you'll know."  ...um...okay???

So back in the car for the 35 minute drive home.  At this point my parents had arrived at my grandmother's house, and we caught Jeremy's parents before they left to the hospital, explaining we were on our way home.

Within the next couple of hours, both sets of our parents headed over to our house to help support Jeremy and I during my labor.  I can't put into words how grateful I am for this time with them.  Jeremy's parents arrived first, and my mother-in-law stepped right into the job; rubbing my back when a contraction came, talking me through it.  She offered water and food, helped Jeremy take breaks when he needed them.

At this point my contractions were gaining in intensity and I made my way to the bathtub for some relief.  This worked a couple of times, but around noon my contractions were getting pretty intense and when I asked Jeremy what he though, he said, "Let's head back to the hospital, I think it's time."

So, our second trip, 35 minutes to the hospital.  Somehow our parents arrived before we did, which I found amusing.  Again we checked in, and made our way back to triage.

Once in triage for the second time, the nurse this time around was amazing.  She gave Jeremy and I some great advice.  She again hooked me up to all of the monitors, and asked me more questions.  Dying of anticipation, she FINALLY checked me.  "Sweetheart, you're 3 cm dilated."  My face must have show it all.  She immediately praised me for the progress I had made since my first visit.  She explained that she had done an all natural birth and advised us to go home once again.  She explained that I would most likely deliver in 7-14 hours and the longer I stayed home the more comfortable I would be, as I wouldn't have nurses constantly checking on me and I wouldn't have to be hooked up to monitors.

She asked us why we wouldn't want to go home, our only answer was of convenience.  It's a half an hour each way, and being in the car during contractions was nearly unbearable.  She said, "So go to the mall!  You don't have to go all the way home.  Walk around, it'll help."  THE MALL?!?!  Yeah right.

Once again, we all headed back to our house.  My MIL had made some food, so I attempted to eat a little to keep up my strength.  At this point we had been in labor for over 12 hours with minimal to no sleep the night before.  I took a few bites, drank some juice and headed back up stairs to our bedroom, which is where I labored the majority of the time while I was at home.

My mom and my MIL right by my sides, supporting me as best they could.  reminding me to relax, to breath, rubbing my back, and hydrating me.  After about 45 minutes all of a sudden I felt like I had peed my pants.  I exclaimed, "I THINK MY WATER BROKE!" as I rushed to the bathroom, and sure enough it had.

This was also one of the stipulations the doctors had told us to go back to the hospital if my water broke as I was Group B Strep positive and required antibiotics immediately.  So at this point it's around 3:00 Monday afternoon and we headed back to the hospital for the 3rd and final time.  I had heard that once your water breaks your contractions get more intense, but I can't say that I for sure experienced this.  They were already very intense at that point.

One thing I feel helped, which I had learned through hypnobirthing was to breath my baby down.  This was a great focus for me and helped me to relax my upper body and concentrate on my breathing.  Another tip the nurse had mentioned was to wait until the peak of my contraction to close my eyes and start my breathing.  At this point, I would count backwards from 20 and the most intense part of my contraction was over.  This was a huge part of my labor, and really got me through some of the most intense contractions.  This way you're only concentrating on 20 seconds of the contractions instead of the entire thing.

So, once again, we check in, head back to triage and I was finally admitted.  They hooked me up to all the monitors and started my IV.  The nurse was the same one who had given me the tips during our last trip to the hospital, and she did comment that she felt I was much more confident and controlled during my contractions since the last time I had come it.  At this point I got very sick, the nurse told us this was very common during transition times of labor, hormones will increase causing vomiting.  It was terrible, but didn't last too long thankfully.  Soon after, they transferred us to our delivery room.

For the next couple of hours, the 6 of us were in the delivery room, with Jeremy and my mom once again stepping up to the plate and guiding me through each contraction.  At one point, they were getting so intense and painful that after each one I was having to us my essential oils, specifically peppermint to aide with the nausea.  I was checked around 5/5:30 Monday afternoon and I had progressed to 6 cm.  Within the next hour, the contractions were becoming more unbearable.

My mom and Jeremy were great at communicating with me.  The let me know when the contraction was starting, when it was starting to peak, and when the break was coming up.  Within this hour I was getting hardly any break though.  They were the most intense I had delt with, then they would go down to a medium one immediately, then to a smaller contraction, and then right back up to another intense one.  I was maybe getting a minute break in between these long stretches.  I was exhausted.  I had been laboring since 11:00 the night night before.  We were approaching 19 hours of labor and I needed HAD to be checked, I wanted to know how much progress I had made, how far along we had come in that time, how much more I needed to get through to get this little baby here.

So the nurse checked me around 6:00 PM Monday April 14.  Still 6 cm.  No change in that hour.  I couldn't do it anymore.  I was done, I was defeated.  Jeremy and I had a plan for when this time would come, because we knew it would.  He would talk me down, calm me, explain that we just have to concentrate on one contraction at a time.  I could do it just one more time.  "Let's get through one more," he said.  "I know you can do it, you're strong."

The next one came, and went.  Even more intense then the last, and I needed relief.  I needed a rest, a break, some time to regroup.  I begged for the epidural.  Within 30 minutes I was a completely different person.  I was happy, talking to my family, feeling nothing, resting, regrouping, and eventually sleeping.

My nurse advised things would probably start to move a little more quickly now that I had the epidural.  My body would be able to completely relax and do it's job in moving the baby down.  Sure enough within the next hour I progressed to 7 cm, then 8 cm in the next, and by 10:30 PM I was at 9 cm.  Things were looking good!  No C-section here, I was going to be able to do this!.

At 11:30 PM Monday April 14, the nurse came to check me again.  I was so anxious.  If things continued the way they had been, I should be at 10 CM and ready to start pushing.  If I was lucky, I would only push for a half an hour and deliver this baby on her due date.  "I'm ready," I thought, let's get this baby here!

To my surprise, I was still 9 CM, not any sign of being close to 10 CM.  I continued to rest during this time, with the nurse or resident coming in every hour to check me.  Still 9 CM at 12:30 AM Tuesday....1:30 AM still 9 CM... 2:30 AM 9 CM.  Things were not looking good for a vaginal delivery.

The resident thought the baby was possibly stuck in the birth canal, unable to descend any lower.  At this point Pitocin was administered because my contractions had decreased in strength and frequency.  My cervix thinned a little, but I was still at 9 CM at 5:00 AM Tuesday morning.

The resident came in and asked how we felt about a C-Section.  We commented that we knew it could be a possibility as my mother had a C-Section with my brother and I.  "But, can't we increase the Pitocin for a couple more hours to see if it will work?" I asked. 

She replied that we could, that she had a C-Section scheduled and if we were going that route we'd have to wait a couple of hours anyway.  So they increase the Pitocin, stopped all food intake only allowing me ice chips (remember I have been in labor now for 30 hours and was STARVING!) and attempted positioning me in a number of new and different position.

The nurse came in and checked me around 5:30 and said that I had started to thin out again, and she thought I would be able to deliver vaginally!  And when I asked for food, she said she would contact my doctor personally to get the okay.  10 minutes later I had Jell-o and juice!!! I was on cloud nine!

At around 6:00 the new nurse came on shift.  She discussed with the other nurse where I was and within minutes I was checked one last time and told, "Okay, with the next contraction I want you to try and push."

WHAT?!  Hold on, a couple hours ago I was basically being wheeled in for a C-section.  Now I'm dilated 10 CM and ready to push?!?!  I was in shock, the reality of what was about to happen had not settled in.

Our families left the room so just Jeremy and I could experience the miracle that was about to happen.  I started pushing at 6:30 AM Monday April 15.  Things moved quickly from this point on,  Many doctors, residents, nurses and baby nurses filled the room.  Endless counts to ten, praising for being a good pusher, "GO GO GO!"  I had an amazing team in front of me, guiding and coaching me through it all. 

The doctor said the baby was coming in transverse (sideways) and had turned "sunny side up."  This is where the baby is facing up towards my belly instead of facing down at my spine.  This is a more difficult type of delivery as the head doesn't fit as well into the birthing canal.  Luckily with a few pushes, and some coaxing from the doctor, she was able to turn the baby the right way.

After two hours of pushing, Charlotte Rose Rials was born at 8:35 AM Tuesday April 15.  When she came out I though I saw that she was a girl, but I exclaimed, "Let me see what it is!" to make sure, as I was the one who was going to announce the gender of the baby.  "It's a girl," I cried!  A girl.  I turned to Jeremy, tears streaming down my face, him with tears in his eyes, "We have a baby girl."

For the next hour and a half it was just the three of us, getting to know each other, infatuated with our daughter.

33 and a half hours of labor, 2 hours of pushing, on the verge of a C-Section.  It all seemed like a dream once I was holding her in my arms.

Welcome to the world our beautiful Charlotte Rose.

Charlotte Rose: Week 1

I can't believe I'm writing this post about our 1 week old!  It has gone by in a flash, and we are still getting to know our little one.  I'm in the process of writing up her birth story, which I have already cried through multiple times.

In this week we have learned:

Charlotte loves being rocked by her daddy
She's a tough one to burp
I now fully understand the term "blow out"
We're slowly getting into a schedule of some sort
She loves being in the Baby K'tan carrier with mommy
The cats are adjusting as well as can be expected
I never knew how much my mom loved me until I held my daughter in my arms
I have a daughter

Here's a few pictures from the hospital and our first days home, a little out of order.  Enjoy!

Grammy D and Grandpa

Nana and Gramps

Jeremy cutting Charlotte's nails

First visit with Dr. Ross

Happy Birthday Uncle Travis!

Uncle Travis and Auntie Sam

First Easter basket from Nana and Gramps

Happy Easter!

In the MamaRoo swing

Born at 8:35

6 lbs 11 oz

Foot prints

Aunt Lisa

The Rials Family

Aunt Melissa

First bath with daddy

Happy Easter!

39 Weeks: "Patiently" Waiting

Well 39 weeks has come and gone and tomorrow is the baby's due date.  We had a doctor's appointment on Friday and have progressed to 2 cm dilated.  I am so grateful I have progressed!!!  Seems like walking and bouncing on the physioball is doing something.

I will say I wasn't quite happy with how our appointment went.  As she was checking me she asks, "Do you want me to swirl my finger around, or get outta there?"

UM...WHAT????

First of all I have no idea what you're talking about, and second, this is totally uncomfortable...so GET OUTTA THERE!

So after she finishes checking me, I asked what she meant by, "swirl my finger around."  She explained what she meant was if I wanted her to strip my membranes.  What does that mean??? 

***Continue reading if you're so inclined, if you don't want to read the details of pregnancy skip on down a couple of paragraphs***

Stripping of the membranes is a way to attempt to induce (start) labor.  In this procedure, the doctor will use a gloved finger to gently separate the amniotic sac from the wall of the uterus. This releases hormones that can trigger contractions.  It can be uncomfortable (painful from testimonials I have read).  I'm having trouble finding reliable statistics on the effectiveness of stripping the membranes in assisting with inducing labor, but from what I've found so far, it only works about 50% of the time.  In addition, the more I research, if you're Group B Strep + you should not have your membranes stripped as this could increase the baby's chance of infection (although the CDC says there is no data to support this yet).

So, I was not warned or asked prior to my doctor checking me if I wanted the procedure done, nor was there any discussion regarding me being GBS + and the risk involved with stripping my membranes.  Needless to say, my next appointment I will most definitely be bringing this up!

I've been feeling much more tired the last couple of days, taking 2-3 hour naps each day.  My feet and ankles have really started to swell up and no matter what I do, I can't seem to get rid of it.  Baby is continuing to try and move around in there.  When I'm in the tub relaxing with the music on seems to be this little one's favorite time to try out new dance moves.

At this point, although I am more then ready to have this baby, I feel as though this little one will come when the time is right; and although I'm uncomfortable I should not rush the timeline this baby has.  Our next appointment is Wednesday, I'll be 40 weeks and a couple of day and we'll reevaluate at that point.

In other news, I went to the fire department and had our car seat checked.  Jeremy installed it correctly behind the drivers seat, but in fact, the safest spot is in the center back seat.  We initially installed it behind the drivers seat because that's where the hooks were to strap the base in, rather than using the seat belt.  But the lady explained that even though we'd be using the seat belt in the center spot, it was still safer then behind the drivers seat.  She also scolded me about using these cute owl strap covers that my mom had purchased and the mirror to see the baby in while driving.  She explained we should not use anything in the car seat that did not already come with it, and in regards to the mirror, she explained that in an accident it could become dislodged and fly at the baby and cause additional injuries.  So, all in all, I'm glad I went and now know exactly how to install our car seat.

Jeremy and I spent all weekend continuing to prep for baby.  We made a Costco run and are stocked up for months on toilet paper and paper towels.  We also bought more than enough cat food and cleaned their areas up so we won't have to worry about that once the babe is here.  We did some relaxing too and watched movies and laid in bed for hours.  I'm trying to really soak up this alone time with my husband knowing any day now it won't be the two of us any more (yes I'm tearing up just thinking about that).  He is continuing to support me unconditionally, holding me while I cry for no apparent reason, and jump at my many foodie demands.  If being pregnant hasn't made me fall in love with him more every day, I can't even begin to imagine what seeing him as a father will do. 

Fingers crossed my next post will be baby's birth story!  Until then...